Wednesday, June 23

What Am I Waiting For?


I spent the entire week taking in words and images that fed the hunger inside to create. It got greater and greater, until tonight when it became time to sit down and write this blog post. Hmph. Figures, huh? So what happened? I got quiet within myself and just waited. I kept waiting until something came. I had to laugh when it did. Sunday is the first day of Advent. What is Advent about? Preparing yourself and waiting until something or Someone comes. I just looked at Wikipedia, and it calls Advent "expectant waiting."

Was that what I've been doing all week? Expectant waiting? Reading the blogs and stalking the people on Facebook who seem to have gotten it already? Following the images of something greater than I could ever create, thinking, "Wow, if only...I wish I could...God, please...." It didn't feel like expectant waiting--it felt a little bit like feeling small and wanting to be bigger and not knowing how to be. Then I thought of the literal meaning of the word "inspiration"-- from the Latin inspirare, meaning "to breathe into." Christians think of inspiration as a gift from the Holy Spirit. The Greeks believed that inspiration or "enthusiasm" came from the Muses and the gods Dionysus and Apollo. The ancient Norse religion had a similar belief.

I believe that we have a divine gift and desire to create because we know innately that there is something larger than ourselves that wants to come and breathe in us and through us. I believe in a sense that's what Advent is. We are feeling small, and we know there's Someone out there who wants to come and breathe life into us. Thank goodness for this time to be reminded of it.


  • Fun fact to know … The English “enthusiasm” comes from 2 Greek words “en” meaning “in” or “inside”, and “theos” meaning “god”. So “enthusiasm” literally means “en-theos”-ism: having a god inside (me). So “enthusiasm”, in the original “primal” etymological sense, means the sensation of self-transcendence that feels as if the Divine is indwelling us.

  • My favorite prayer is ” Holy Spirit think through me till your ideas are my ideas. It was written by Amy Carmichael and can be found in the book “Communion of Saints: Prayers of the Famous.” I regularly change it depending on my need – think through me, speak through me, love through me, until your … becomes my… When I pray it, I find that I also breath deeply. I really enjoyed this post – thanks.

    • Exactly, Pat. I will definitely go looking for that prayer. That’s completely what I was thinking of, and of course, didn’t have words for. I haven’t read any Amy Carmichael in a VERY long time. It seems as if it’s time to go back to her. She might have much to say about where I am right now.

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