mother – Beguine Again

Apr42018 by Jamie DedesNo Comments

For the Record: Remembering Mom

memoir

First publication: March 15, 2012, Connotation Press I am the keeper of the dreams and the memories, the matrix where the generations converge, the record-book held between familial bookends. I am responsible for passing her life on to him that she may continue to live and that he may understand the consequences of history and culture as common people do. He is the vindication of hope, his and ours. Her heart is the place were hope started. I can hardly think of my son without also thinking of my mother. They are the two people I love most in this world, though one of them - Mom - is no longer here. So for the record, I’m not sure why, but the pancake breakfasts I had with her at Oscar’s of the Waldorf are on my mind. We had rituals we honored until life had its way with her. ______ ...

Gratitude for Grief

Gratitude

Today's post is hard to write. I've been putting it off. Two years ago I said goodbye to my Mom standing in the front foyer of the house I grew up in. She was crying because she didn't want us to leave. I told her I loved her, kissed her, and hugged her. I cried as I walked away. That was the last time I saw my mother alive. Grief this week has been strong. I miss the way she was always so sure of herself. I miss her determination to enjoy life every moment she could. I miss her telling me she loved me which she did every time she talked to me. I miss sitting the living room and pontificating on life with her. I miss doing projects and events with her (though sometimes this drove me crazy too). I miss how she never knew a stranger, everyone was welcome at her house. She would say, "We w...

Gratitude for Mom’s Laughter

Gratitude

Mother's Day is Sunday. It's a tough time for my family and me since we lost Mom last year. I've been quite sad a lot this week. But I've also been laughing often too. I've been looking at old photographs of Mom and she loved to laugh. Oh, she loved to laugh! And we loved to make her laugh too. It was hard not to be happy when my Mom was around laughing. I will be spending this Mother's Day with my youngest godson and remembering my own mother's laughter as we play. I am grateful! "May you experience each day as a sacred gift woven around your heart of wonder." --Jon O'Donohue