I sit and write this blog again early Friday morning. A little while ago, I walked down to a local gas station to get some pop and it was dark out. But amidst the darkness - I walked past this beautiful tree with budding purple flowers. Beauty springing forth not only the darkness of winter but the darkness of night.
This was a reminder from the Sacred, the Divine that beauty can spring forth in the darkness of a soul. Right now I’m struggling on so many fronts that it isn’t even funny. I feel like I’m being attacked on all sides.
Specially my fight against my addiction. While I’m 2 1/2 months clean from drugs, my disease remains active in many other ways. I’m always in some form of HALT (hungry, angry, lonely, tired) lately. Mainly tired and lonely. I try to fill the voids created by being in a HALT state with people and things. I don’t like being alone and I will tend to do anything at all cost to avoid dealing with the darkness of my soul.
But tonight a simple act of walking to get a drink from a gas station provided me an answer from the Sacred and the Divine that I’ve been looking for. Just because I’m in a darkness of soul time doesn’t mean there isn’t beauty in this time. I believe it was on Facebook that I seen a graphic made with the words or something like them on it where it says “they think you’ve been buried but you’ve actually been planted.”
I think this is a season where dirt is being piled on me by people, places, and things that THINK they are burying me alive when in fact they are instruments of the Sacred and the Divine in planting me where I will continue to grow. Where I will first show beauty to the dark soil of the earth & then I’ll spring forth like the most beautiful garden that is meticulously cared for by a Master Gardener.
Where can you find beauty in the darkness and what will you do to bring that beauty above the surface and bring that beauty into the dawn of a new day?
Me -> I’m going to keep looking for opportunities to share my experience, strength, and hope with all of those who need it in all areas of my life but especially in the areas that I’m struggling with.
Peace Be With You,