Author: Brian Kleber

33 year old transgender nonbinary United Methodist who is an addict in recovery. I live in the Pittsburgh, PA area.

Gratitude for Multiple Emotions All at Once

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Hello Dear Faithful Readers -Before I get to what is on my heart - I want to apologize for not writing last week. Somehow the week got away from me and before I knew it - I was laying my head on my pillow Friday night realizing that I hadn't written my post for you all. Life definitely happened last week and it was surely a rollercoaster of emotions.I sit here in my kitchen on my laptop conflicted. I am honestly so spiritually angry at the UMC right now that if I didn't have an amazing reconciling pastor - I'd run for the damn hills. This week my beloved friend Rev. Anna Blaedel (Theologian-in-Residence at enfleshed) was forced to endure a hearing with the Committee about whether or not the bill of charges brought against them in this third complaint should be certified and sent to trial....

Grateful in Recovery

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Hello fellow readers! I am sorry that I'm just now getting to write this Gratitude Friday post nearly halfway through the day. Last night was a night where I really needed to listen to what my body was telling me it needed, which was as much sleep as I could get.So I'm sitting here at a local coffee shop sipping on a vanilla caramel macchiato which is my go-to drink at ANY coffee shop. I have finished my treatment program for the week which was very interesting and challenging to get through. Which is why I've chosen this week to write about being grateful in recovery. As I type this post I have been able to string together a total of 17 "Just For Today" without putting any mind or mood altering chemicals in me to deal with life on life's terms. My perspective while I was actively using w...

The Prodigal Beloved Comes Home

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Hello everyone! It has been so very long since I've actually sat down to write on Beguine Again that as I sit down in my hotel room on my brand new laptop that it feels weird and almost foreign to be writing. As I have shared with all you wonderful folxs and our beloved readers - I struggle on an everyday basis with two very powerful demons.. several different mental health disorders and substance use disorder. Recently I suffered a setback in my substance use disorder recovery journey and I ended up in rehab yet again. The night I came home I fell into the cunning, baffling, and powerful grips of addiction again. I wish I could say I fought it as hard as I could. But quite honestly I didn't use any of the coping skills I had learned from the rooms of the 12 step fellowships, various ...